Relaxation! Kinda...

I'm finally on my summer break! Thank the heavens above! I can finally just go through a whole day without thinking about academics or what's due the next day. Might I add, I had all A's and B's my first year in college. Do I rock, or what?

Now that summer's beginning, I've been trying to find things to do in order to keep me from dying a terrible death...of being murdered by boredom. Other than the large amounts of video games I will be playing, and the shows I need to catch up on, I'll actually be doing something productive,or at least I will be trying!

I've decided I want to learn to cook. I have been motivating myself by watching endless hours of Food Network. I want to be able to make delicious things, and hopefully be skilled enough to renovate dishes that I know and make them better. I feel like I've taken on quite the task...but I'm gonna do it! In fact, here's the first thing I cooked! (Thanks for helping, mom!)

So this marvelous dish is called Sopita. My mom has made it ever since I was old enough to remember, and I love it each and every time I eat it. When I try to explain it to my friends, I usually just say, "It's like Mexican macaroni and cheese". It contains macaroni noodles, tomato sauce, and colby jack cheese. For flavor, we add garlic salt, pepper, and some crushed red peppers for spice. I'm pretty sure I can make this on my own now, so I definitely know I'm making progress!


On a less exciting note, I also feel as if I'll just go back to being terribly bored again. There's just this void I feel like I'm trying to fill, (wow, way to be cliché), and everything I do just doesn't seem to help. I'll admit, I'm kind of missing the whole "dating" stuff, and I really hate admitting that. I just feel like I don't need a relationship to be entertained, but I also feel like I'd be a bit more upbeat if I did. I'd feel like the days wouldn't drag on and on.


Well, back to more exciting stuff! (Can't end this entry on a sad note.) I'm also thinking of ways to improve my writing. Blogging is one of them, which I will be trying to do more often, but I need more. I crave more. So...I might do something I wanted to stay away from. I might...write fan-fiction. Oh Lord, you have no idea how hard that was to say. Anywho, if you aren't familiar with the world of fan-fiction, it's basically taking books/movies/video games that already exist, and creating a story using it. (I'm trying my best to explain this...so bear with me!) Basically, you're just using that material as a premise, while creating your own story within it, using the characters from it and/or adding your own characters. I'm only so against it because I had a certain friend who would act like it was the actual story, and thus, I thought I would turn into a noob as well. (Noob: n. A person who fails.)


Hopefully, after this summer, I'll feel a bit better about myself and be somewhat productive. Here I come, summer! And on that note, I'll make sure to think of wittier comments this summer...

A First Experience

Disclaimer: This post is brought to you by Jeff on Three Hours of Sleep inc.


So I just recently played one of the most horrific games (well, the series is horrific) in my lifetime. Silent Hill: Homecoming is the name of this beauty, and I thoroughly enjoyed each and every moment of it (when I wasn't peeing my pants). It was quite an amazing story line, and I probably could have gone through the whole game without stopping. However, being tired forced me to stop at about 3:30am when I had started around 8:30pm with my highly interesting friends, minus the one who worked himself up so much, he fell asleep (you know who you are, mis amores!) Fatigue...how dare you!



Well anyway, this game gave me three hours of sleep that night. Only three hours for fudge's sake. I woke up at about 6:45am, and images of the game clouded my mind. I desperately tried to close my eyes and fall back into dreamland, but failed. It was a surprise to me that I even fell asleep. It was almost a struggle to figure out what to do with all this time on a Sunday morning. However, I did make it through just about half that beautifully haunting game, so I joined up with my brave friend to conquer my first true horror game (after consuming my body weight in caffeine, of course). I must be a masochist. I mean, yeah, I played Resident Evil games, but this was way different. Dead bodies don't fall from the ceiling in Resident Evil games, and creepy dolls don't soak up blood and become twice your size in order to kill you.


In this sense, I feel like I'm such a contradiction. Horror games are so excited for me to play, but I can't help but be scared shortly after I play them. I learned in Psychology that horror is supposed to be a certain arousal we have as human beings to create a sense of enjoyment, but why on earth would I still subject myself to this nonsense? Oh, right. It's fun.


Either the game was gradually losing its sense of horror, or I was being desensitized, because toward the end, I became less afraid of the game. This is actually my goal, to be honest. I hate that I become disturbed from horror games after playing them, but the plots are always so good, that I feel like I need to toughen up and play these games for real. As a writer, I feel like I'm also expanding my horizons by playing these games, and subjecting myself to the mental torment. In the end, I know it will be worth it!

Now, I have some advice. If you're like me, and you're a big wimp when it comes to horror, there are some things that I noticed I do to keep me from going insane.

1. If you don't care for the theatrical effect of the room (playing in the dark) you're participating in horror (games, movies, etc.), watch/play these games/movies earlier in the day. Make sure to stop at a time in which you can busy yourself with other things before you go to bed (especially if that's what bothers you).

2. Always remind yourself that the horror in the media (depending on what you're playing/watching) isn't real. Trust me. After Silent Hill, I had to convince myself that nurses with heads wrapped in bandages who attempt to slice your throat out...do not exist.


3. Have friends/family in the room with you. I always enjoy when my friends make commentary during gameplay to keep me from being too nervous to go on. However, I make sure that they stay quiet during cutscenes in games. (For horror movies, having someone with you can still prove useful, but only for moral support, and possibly not commentary, especially if you can't stand people talking during a movie. Just make sure they shut up when there's dialogue again!)


4. Just have at it! If you don't subject yourself to horror, you'll never get used to it, and you will always be cowering in fear.

Have fun!

Music

Music is one of things that EVERYBODY in this world loves, I'm sure. Certain types make us happier than others, and others are more pleasurable to hear, but our reasons for liking songs are much different. People enjoy beats, the lyrics, the way the person's voice sounds, and many other aspects of certain songs.

I happen to be a very avid Korean pop fan (I listen to rock/alternative. and some american pop as well, but Korean pop is one of my favorites, along with rock/alternative/indie). I enjoy it so much, that I probably listen to it for at least an hour every day. When I mention to anyone that I am a fan, a very common response is, "How can you like it if you can't even understand it?" Well, that's a great question. I enjoy music based on how everything fits together. If the words, instrumentation, and the person's voice all sound good to me, I'll enjoy the song. Very seldom do I find a song where the lyrics are just so terrible that I can't even handle it. If I really get curious about my koreans' lyrics, I just look them up. It's really not that hard.

This just really bugs me because it's like, why do I have to understand the lyrics just to like the song? I'll admit, I thoroughly enjoy songs with deep, lyrical meanings (Say Anything, one of my favorite bands, has lots of those), but I also enjoy songs in which the lyrics aren't all that great (depending on my circumstances). Like, my koreans. They sing about love and falling in it and all that good stuff. The lyrics can be pretty childish, and it doesn't take a whole lot of brain power to understand what their point is, but I enjoy the songs anyway. You have to be talking about some pretty terrible stuff for me to actually dislike a song for the lyrics.

Like everything else in life, we should like music for our own reasons, and not because of what anyone else says. I know, for sure, that I'm getting sick of people asking me about why I like Korean pop, even though I don't understand it. I choose not to follow the norm. I like it for my reasons, and not yours.

Support + Friends =...Well, it Doesn't Always Happen

You would expect, and hope, that your friends would be your main source of support for you and your choices (other than family, of course). What happens when you have those certain friends that just seem to leave you in the dust when it comes to being supported? How do you handle hearing that something about you is just something they don’t support?

Sorry, but I like to use these examples of my homosexuality, because they seem so relevant at times. I have had/still have friends that were completely against gay marriage. Obviously, I’m completely for it. It’s hard hearing that someone I admire and support in every way feels like I shouldn’t be happy in the future. I almost feel furious at them, so badly wanting to just give them every breath of spiteful words that I ever could, but I know that it just wouldn’t be worth it. What could I possibly say? 

That’s where the dilemma kicks in. It’s not like you can force them to support something that they don’t stand for, but how do you handle it when it happens? The best I’ve been able to do is try and avoid the subject at all costs, but when these friends (because they don’t ALWAYS keep their harsh opinions to themselves) say something offensive about it, I feel as if I have to retaliate, no matter how much I care about them. I don’t make fun of what they stand for, so I don’t expect them to do the same.

This support doesn’t even have to be drastic. It can even be smaller things. Just little reminders that say that they’re your friend, and they have your back no matter what. Acting a certain way about someone’s beliefs or what they stand for can leave them feeling abandoned. It could make them feel as if they’re the only one standing up against the forces of their opposition. Even if you don’t agree with some belief they just keep ranting on about, just say that it’s at LEAST interesting (because that’s a very neutral answer, according to my Humanities teacher), or praise them for how passionate they are about it, because aspects like that make us human. Friends need to be supportive, because no one deserves to feel alone.

Awkward Encounters

So you’re walking to class/work/to the store/your dog/your cat, and you come across someone whom you normally see somewhere that isn’t where you’re currently standing, whether it be at school, at work, or any other place you met them. Suddenly, you feel awkward. Has this happened to you? I know it happens to me.

I find it strange that we are weird about meeting people socially that we normally know through somewhere business related. In other words, seeing someone you know NOT in the place you normally hang with them, it feels awkward to talk to them. For example: I met someone recently who I only know around my dorm area, and they looked directly at me at least three or four times, and didn’t say a word. Sure, I could have waved, or just shouted, “HEY!”, seeing as I was about twenty-five feet away from him. 

Is it just impossible to acknowledge that these people you know CAN and WILL appear in your life, and that it’s perfectly okay to talk to them outside your natural comfort zone with them? This could apply to anything! When you have a person you talk to a lot in one of your classes, you feel pretty comfortable around them. Once you see them anywhere else, such as the grocery store, or a pet store, you become uncomfortable with that person. Can this really affect how we act around this person? And how is it that we just seem to forget who they are when we aren’t seeing them in places we normally see them? This bothers me. It really grinds my gears. How can you just act as if you’ve never seen them when you have absolutely awesome conversations with them in your common meeting area? I wish I could figure this out, but human motives aren’t always so clear. Could it be because they’re used to seeing you in a certain place, and when you see them elsewhere, it throws you off guard? In my opinion, that shouldn’t affect much, but what can you do? 

Kind of a sporadic topic, but hey, that’s what I do. I comment on those random happenings in life that keep you pondering.

Just Another Reflection on Life and Human Behavior

So this is gonna be quite a random post, but it’s something I want to rant about. 

Have you ever just been walking by yourself, or with others, or with your cat, and you notice someone that you are acquainted with, and you say, “Hey, (whatever their name is)!”. When they see you, they say, “Oh hey what’s up?” as they walk right past you, without stopping. I just kind of think, “the point of that was…?” They don’t give you a chance to respond to their question. It also bugs me when the circumstances are the same, but instead they’re like “Hey how are you?” as you walk by each other. It makes me feel bad for not responding, and asking them about their well being, but they don’t give me the chance, seeing as their walking away. What are we supposed to do when people do that? Progressively speak louder as their walking away in order to respond to their question? Wouldn’t that be socially awkward? 

I guess my point is, if the person is going to bother to ask “What’s up?” or “How are you?” as you’re walking by them, they should at least have the decency to stop and have a very brief conversation with you. It doesn’t even have to last a whole minute. Just enough to ask how each other is doing, and if one or both parties is in a hurry, they can vocalize that, and be on their way. Manners, people. They get you places.

Stranger Danger!

Remember when we were little, and parents would tell us all about what to do if a stranger approaches you? I sure do! I remember them saying the cliché situations, such as, “If they offer you candy, say no!” and, “If they ask you to help you find their puppy, don’t.” There were other great examples I’m sure, but wouldn’t it be at least a tad bit funny if you could mess with them a bit? 

If you’re a teen or adult, you can still get approached by strangers, but at least you have wits on your side, instead of being a small, naive child trying to ward off a fifty-year-old man or woman. I think it would be funny (but maybe not ideal, so don’t try this at home, haha!) to mess with them a bit, and there’s ways you can do it for both being a child and being an adult. 

Stranger: “Hey, I’ve got some candy. Wanna see what I have?”

Child: “Candy makes me vomit.”

Stranger: “I’ve seemed to have lost my puppy. Can you help me find it?”

Child: “Puppies are the spawn of Satan. My mommy says if I touch one, I’ll die.”

Well, those are pretty funny, right? If you didn’t think so, then you sure can think of your own ways to mess with them. Do you want to see some adult ones? Okay!

Bum on Street: “Hey wanna buy some drugs?”

Teen/Adult: “I don’t think my insurance will pay for that…” 

Some random person: “Hey baby girl you lookin’ fine!”

Lady: “Why does everyone think I’m a woman!?” 

A very not-classy girl: “Hey big daddy, wanna spend the night with me?”

Man: “Wait. So…will it be, like, normal? Or will it be like throwing a pencil down a hallway?”

So you may or may not have found my examples funny. Oh well! Yes, these random strangers are human too, but the thought of messing with them could be kind of funny. I don’t really recommend it, for obvious reasons of course. I mean, they might adore vomiting children, or women who are actually men. Just remember: Stranger Danger!