I've been hearing about a few things in the LGBT community that are really making me angry. You know, we don't do anything harmful to anyone, so why do people muster up so much hate for us? You could be transferring all that hate and passion into something else, rather than hating a community that wants nothing more than equal rights.
First and foremost, I heard a story about an A+ student heading in a bright, fortunate direction, but her school forced her to leave after she came out to them as lesbian. Here's a small article about it.
Why does it matter that she is lesbian? Does that have some negative influence on whether or not you believe she can be a brilliant student? We're not inhuman. We think just like every other human does, and I don't believe anyone would do such a thing. Our orientation has nothing to do with how we perform academically, professionally, or in society. We're still human.
The next thing that really made me angry had to do with the repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell. A brave, strong-willed woman decided to tweet exactly how she felt about the situation. Here's the tweet:
First of all: who are you to say whether or not God is pleased? Is he sending you messages in your hateful head? I would think that this is why Christians get a bad image, and these are some of the reasons why gays/bisexuals/lesbians are still considered a minority. My other thought on this is...how will this end the earth? Because we're allowed to be open about our orientation in the military, God is just going to smite us all? I just found this to be the most ridiculous bit of ignorance I've seen.
Also, in response to that, there are a few states that allow same-sex marriages, and in fact, many people have married their same-sex partner. So my question to the bible thumpers are: If these have happened, and God is so against it, why won't he smite us all? Oh, right, because instead, we're just going to burn in Hell. Totally forgot that!
I had to get that out of my system, because the ignorance of our country as a whole is starting to become more and more real as I see this things being said. I can't, for the life of me, comprehend why people harbor such hate for the LGBT community, when we just want equal rights. I just wish I knew how they could sleep at night, as their blood pumps hate throughout their entire body.
In light of National Coming Out Day (which was yesterday, but it's National Coming Out Week at my school, so all your arguments are invalid), I decided I would post about that major turning point in any Gay, Lesbian, or bisexual individual's life: Coming out.
Now from what I've seen and experienced, the reaction is either on or the other. The people you come out to can be accepting, or they won't. There's no "Well, I suppose I'm okay with it, only IF..." No. In my experience, that will turn into not accepting the individual. Because this can go either way, this is never an easy task for anyone. Hell, even to this day, I still get nervous when I tell new people that I'm gay. You just never know if that person will immediately turn you down, simply because of your sexual orientation.
It's really upsetting that there are even people that won't accept their gay child. Also, it's upsetting that some people just can't accept a gay person in general. I was told by my friend, who was telling his mother about a play that was going on at school, something she said. He was mentioning that one of the students in our school was playing a gay character, and the actor himself is gay. His mother then says "That's a shame." He asked for clarification, and then she said "It's a shame that you have gay people at your school." It's things like this that make coming out the most challenging thing in these people's lives. When they're surrounded by people like this, it can result in one of two things. They can either:
A.) Keep themselves "in the closet", never feeling as if they're allowed to truly be who they are.
B.) Become discouraged or hurt because once they're out, because their "choice" just isn't right.
People get bullied because of their sexuality, and if you keep up with the LGBTQ community, you know about the handful of teen suicides because of ignorant acts like this.
After bringing up our "choice", I thought of another point. It's somewhat off-topic, but I feel like it needs to be addressed. I'm sure that, when coming out, someone could be asked "Why are you choosing to be gay/bisexual/lesbian?" This really gets to me, because this is definitely something you don't choose. I'll admit, I would never choose being gay, because love lives don't come as easily for us. We don't have it the hardest, but it's definitely not all peaches and gravy. No one in their right mind would CHOOSE to be gay, and when someone says that we "choose" it, it really just makes my skin crawl. "Do you choose to be straight?"
I had to keep that short, or I'd be going forever.
If you're thinking about coming out, I have a few tips that might be good for you. This is mostly coming from my own experience, and from what I see happening with others.
1. I've noticed that, in this day in age, the teens and young adults are more accepting. If your friends seem to think that being gay/bisexual/lesbian is okay, then go for it. It's better to be out to a few than to no one at all.
2. Test the water with your parents. If they tend to have old fashioned views, maybe just mention things about the gay community. If they don't seem okay with it, maybe wait until you're not under their care, and you've got yourself settled and independent before you come out. You just never know what could happen to you if you're still in their care, and they find out that you're gay.
3. If you don't think you can find anyone to come out to, find a local group of some sort. I'm not very knowledgeable on what kinds of groups there are, but if you're in a college setting, there's bound to be a club you can join where you can be open and makes some friends while you're at it.
I don't have all the answers, but I certainly like to think I do when it comes to this subject. Like I said, it's never an easy thing to do. Once you do come out, though, it changes your life, whether it's for better or worse.
Song of the Week!
So this is, yet again, a song by The Bird and the Bee. I've been obsessed with this band for a few weeks now, and I'm pretty sure this is my favorite of their songs now. It's called "Again and Again" (as you can see), and for some reason, I kind of feel like I can relate to this song.
We all have something we aspire to be in the future. For some, it's something that can be easily attained, and for everyone else, it's dreaming big. It gives us something to look forward to, and something that can drive us through our lives. For me, I aspire to be a famous, published author.
I'm sure most of you already knew this, but that's something that would be a dream come true for me. There's just a pleasure I get from writing that I don't get from anything else. I love creating fictional worlds with diverse characters. I love it so much, I almost get enveloped in it, and this doesn't bother me one bit. Hell, I could probably get lost in my writing for a whole day if I wanted to. (The most I've ever spent writing in a day is 9-ish hours).
I love writing so much, I obsess over how well I do it. (You may be able to relate this next section to something you love to do.) When I write, I feel like I'm doing amazing things. The words are flying across the page, the description is coming to life, and I'm feeling great. Right the minute someone wants to read it, or it needs to be presented, my mindset immediately turns to "Oh my lord. They're gonna hate it. I just know it. Everything sucked. Gah!" Naturally, as a human being, that's just how things go.We want to perfect our things that we're good at, and we stress over what other people will think of it.
If I want to become published, though, I have to be patient. Apparently, publishing companies are very picky about the things you send in. It makes sense, of course, because they want to make sure people will actually buy the books. Not only that, but I'd have to work my tail off on a kick-butt novel or short story. Even then, I'd have to make sure that people would actually like the book. So let's see...I'd probably need a literary agent, and then a publicist (if I REALLY want to be famous)...dang. Becoming a famous, published author is gonna be expensive!
So there's my passion, all out there for you to read about. I'm sure you have one too, and if you do, I want to hear about it! Comment on this post about something you dream (or dreamed) of becoming. I'd love to hear what you have to say!
My Song of the Week!
So this is a band called The Bird and the Bee, and I've been obsessing over them for a while. This is my favorite of their songs, and probably their most popular. They just have such a unique sound, and I always feel so happy when I listen to them. (And it's NOT in a foreign language!)
Let's face it: We aren't gonna love every single person we meet in our lives. We're always going to come across people who displease us in a variety of ways, and it just can't be stopped. So naturally, as human beings, what do we do to make sure we never see them again? Oh, of course! We avoid them.
There are many reasons in which you choose to avoid someone. Ironically, one of them could be because of how fond you are of them (and by this, I mean you're highly interested in them). Why on earth would you go head-first into a possible, jovial conversation with your crush, when you can just avoid them? I mean, you're obviously just going to embarrass yourself if you talk to them, so avoiding them is just the best thing! I find this completely paradoxical, but I notice myself doing it sometimes.
Here's one I'm sure a lot of us can relate to. We call in sick to work, and we avoid the outside world for fear that someone we work with will see us. Or, we say we can't cover for someone's shift, and you avoid anyone that works there (or that place of work). Of course, some people might lie to avoid coming in for an extra shift, or even coming to a scheduled shift, and when they do, they use their avoiding skills to be unnoticed! Could you imagine how bad it would be if someone saw you after you told them you couldn't work that day for some obscure reason? Utter. Chaos.
Lastly, and everyone's personal favorite, we avoid people who just plain creep us the eff (that word that rhymes with "duck") out. Being creeped out is just one of those things that no one likes. It's just a statistic (I'm sure). Like, 100/100 people don't enjoy it. Anyway, you see said person, and you immediately think of a detour. Creepers just always be creepin', so you gotta stay away from them, right?
There's also things like avoiding an ex, but that's an obvious one. Once they're an ex, it's just a big, confusing cluster of emotions that you don't even want to deal with by seeing them.
So like I said, it just seems to be part of human nature. We avoid people because we just don't want to be uncomfortable. Discomfort is bad. Of course, it can be hurtful for the other person (if they ever found out...mwahahaha), but at that moment, we're only thinking of ourselves. Plus, who on earth wants a creeper to talk to them? Not I!
So I started a new poll. Go to the top right corner of my poll to vote!
Song of the Week!
This is, (as you can see on the title) "Sixth Sense" by Brown Eyed Girls. They're a super popular Korean band, and their comeback has been awaited by countless fans. This song and video just blew me away, especially the two girls' high notes. It's an amazing song! Listen!
Alright, that's all for now. Peace out, home skillets!
I'm not sure who all is like this, but I tend to over-think things a lot. In other words, I overanalyze people's actions, and I tend to draw far-fetched conclusions from what I see. I'm not all that sure why I do it, and I'm not sure if it's a good thing, but I just do.
For example, a friend of mine that I've known for a while is extremely supportive of the gay community, and he doesn't talk to me all that much, but I've known him for many years. When he ever comments on my Facebook statuses or just in general (which isn't very often), he's almost flirting with me. I question whether or not he likes me, and I still do, even from that pathetic amount of motive that he gave me.
Another example: In one of my classes, and the guy that sits next to me would usually move up to the front with his friend, assuming she wanted him to, and that she was actually there. One day, she asked him to move up to the seat next to her, and he declined. Coincidentally, this was the same day he initiated a conversation with me. Thus, I thought there was a possibility that he liked me, and not in just a friendly sort of way.
I bet you're thinking: "Seriously Jeff, how did you come up with that?" And my answer to that would be: "I have no idea." I might be the only one in the world who's like this. If I am, well...cool? Either way, it's one of the most annoying qualities I possess. It leads me to false hope, and I just get hurt from thinking too deep, and drawing such strange conclusions.
Anyway, do you do something similar to this? If so, comment on this post and tell me about it! It'll be comforting to know that I'm not the only one who over-thinks about everything.
Don't forget to vote in the poll in the top left corner of my blog! Just one more week to answer!
Song of the Week!
So this is "Forget It" by Jewelry S. It took a while for me to like the song, but it wasn't too long before I fell in love with it. It's the perfect mix of pretty and upbeat. Definitely a feel-good song!
That's all for now! Have a great day/night! (Technically it's night).
You're having a rough day. You just finished work/class/your school day, and you're ready to just get home and relax. You're on your way out of the building, and you notice someone trailing behind you. Like the kind person you are, you hold it open for them. Then, the walk right through the door, ignoring your very presence. You're pissed, right? They couldn't even say thank you?
That's right, people. Today is about manners. Us nice people love to dole them out because it's in our nature, but to others, they appear as if they don't even care. If the first paragraph doesn't apply to you, you better get reading, because I guarantee that you will win some respect with some manner usage.
I think of manners as just the simple "please" and "thank you" and "You're welcome"'s that we say to people at the appropriate times. Also saying "God bless you" when someone sneezes is a form of manners. They really aren't that to use, so why can't people just use them? Saying "thank you" when someone does something nice for you, and saying "you're welcome" in return is very simple to do. Even holding the door open for someone is super simple. It just bewilders me that people just can't use manners.
Getting a "thank you" out of someone seems to be like pulling teeth (to me) anymore. Of course, I'm on a college campus, in which it seems no one knows how to operate like a decent human being (just a generalization. Not EVERYONE in college is like that. Just a lot.) I'll admit, sometimes I forget to hold a door open, mostly because I'm too trapped in my own brain to realize it, but I usually look behind me to see if anyone is coming. If they are, I hold it open for them. Now, when they say thank you, it makes me feel like they appreciated what I did. When they don't, I immediately lose respect for them. It's not my job to hold doors open for people I don't know. I could easily just let it close on them, but I wouldn't, because I'm polite. Not only does it make them seem rude, but it also makes them appear to be "too good" for anyone. Seriously: Swallow your pride and say thank you. It's not that hard.
"Please" is also really freakin' easy to use. Yet, almost everyone forgets to use it. It's really not that hard to just add it to a request. "Can you hand me the stapler, please?" See? It's so easy. I feel as if it's so easy, that I start refusing things to my friends because they don't use it. It's also not my job to hand people things, so not saying please is like not even wanting it in the first place. If you can't even say please, why are you trying to ask me to do something for you?
Another one that bugs me is when people try to get by you without saying "excuse me". Some people just think squeezing by you in that tight space that's smaller than an ant, and nearly knocking you over is just fine. Though, I'm sure the person they nearly ran over had some choice words for them. Saying excuse me is also simple to do, and it makes things easier on you, because 9/10 times that you say it, the person you're saying it to will move out of the way.
Saying excuse me to get someone's attention (usually if they're speaking to someone already) is another important concept to remember. Just saying "hey!" or "*insert name here*!" over and over again becomes quite annoying. However, simply said those two magical words will grant you a glorious path to victory! If what you have to say is truly that important to you, saying "excuse me" is the least of your worries.
See? Using manners is simple, and I guarantee that it will make you appear to be a better, more respectable person if you use them. For those who don't use them normally, try it. You'll probably get a smile or two from someone. However, if you run into someone who doesn't like manners, well...maybe you should refer them to this post. Living in a mannerless world is such a scary thing to think about.
Song of the Week!
"Asleep" by Emily Browning. It's one of the single most beautiful songs I've ever heard, and I get chills every time I hear it. Not only is this song good, but the movie is pretty amazing as well. Check it, yo.
Also, don't forget to vote in the poll on the top left corner of my blog! Your input is appreciated!
"Such long words in your title, Jeff!" I know, I know. I'm pretty good like that.
Today, I'll be talking about something that takes so much effort, but is actually the easiest thing in the world to do. It's something that haunts us all, and can make even the strongest of people shake at the knees. Yes, kids. I'm talking about starting conversations with strangers (the good kind, if there's such a thing).
It's that time of year at the university I go to, in which people are now separated from their high-school besties, and they desperately want to make new friends. A majority of the people, of course, are thinking, "Just going up to a stranger and talking to them? How frightening! What if they think I'm weird?" I was like this as a freshman as well, but the thing is, it's really not hard to find some common conversation starting ground with someone you've never met.
So let's refer back to the mentality most people have when it comes to initiating conversations with strangers. Did you refer to it? Paragraph two, in the quotations? Good! Now we're on the same track. Well, the person you're about to talk to is probably thinking the same thing. In most cases (especially in a college setting), they're trying to make friends as well. Unless the person is just a cold hearted witch (but with a B), they're most likely going to just go along with it.
How do you start one of these conversations, you say? Quite simple, actually!
1. Compliment an article of clothing they're wearing.
I've noticed that people stare at my shirts a lot. I know, I know, it's because of my impeccable style, but this isn't the point. They stare at it, smile slightly, and I can tell that they like it. If they wanted to talk to me, all they have to say is "I like your shirt! Where'd you get it?" Or something along those lines. I can guarantee that you'll at least have a minute long conversation with them. What you wear can do wonders.
2. Butt in on a conversation.
Use this sparingly, though. You don't want to cut in on someone talking about their family problems, only to hear you say "Oh my gosh! I have those too!" Anyway, if you hear someone talking to their friend about a band, TV show, animal, flavor of cake, or anything else that you can relate to, say something! It might sound like you're eavesdropping, but trust me, I do this a lot at work. Someone was talking about a video game I like, and I asked them, "Yo! You talkin' 'bout Bioshock?" (Except I sounded much less ganster-like). It was just that simple, and it could be just as simple for you!
3. Be the reason a conversation happens.
Yes. I'm telling you to have impeccable style. Just kidding! In other words, simply be yourself. Find ways to express yourself, and just go for it. If you want to wear a panda bear hat (which I will end up doing at some point) out and about, then do it! Someone will end up saying something about it. I mean, who wouldn't? You're wearing a panda hat! (Of course, you can wear any kind of hat you want. I'm not limiting you to pandas, even though they're adorable.)
These are just a few ways, but definitely not all of them. I know it's not easy to just talk to someone you've never met. Believe me, I know. If the fear of being rejected by the person is the only thing from stopping you, it's completely understandable, but easily able to be worked through. Just take a deep breath, walk up to that stranger, and tell her that her skirt is tucked into her underwear. You'll be a lifesaver, and you'll probably make a new friend.
Almost forgot to tell you...vote in the poll I made at the top left corner! Do it! Yeah!
Song of the Week!
So there were two songs I couldn't stop listening to this past week, and I was debating which one I should put up. I was so stuck, that I'm just going to post both!
This song came out last week, and I can't get over how amazing it is. The video is also really adorable.
I've been jamming to this since I got it yesterday. The rap section in the song is actually really cool, and I don't really like rap music.
I finished my Supernatural Fanfiction! Here's the finished product, for those that are interested! The whole story!
About a week ago, I saw the movie, "The Help", and, first off, I absolutely loved it. It's one of my favorite movies now. If you haven't seen it yet, get into your car, onto your bike, or ride your dragon to the theater, and watch it ASAP. Don't have a car, bike, or dragon? I suppose you can ask a friend to take you, but wouldn't it be better to fly a dragon into the parking lot? All them moviegoers will be quite jealous of you.
Anyway, for those of you who haven't seen the movie (or read the book, for that matter), I won't be telling you anything you haven't already seen in the previews. So yes! You can read my post without screaming at me, saying "Curse you, Jeff! You ruined the movie for me!" Or some other choice words. Anyway, let's move on! (Okay so MAYBE there are a few minor spoilers, but I promise it won't ruin the experience for you if you see it.)
As I watched this movie, I became very intrigued by Euginia, or "Skeeter", as they called her. I felt like I was very similar to her, but also different in many ways. All in all, I want to be more like her.
She, as you all probably knew, once she got a job at a publishing company, wanted to write her own book coming from the maids' point of view. Of course, this caused scandals left and right, but Skeeter knew what she was doing.
I felt like we were similar because we both felt inadequate as young adults, not really feeling desirable by anyone. She and I both are very cynical when it comes to being in a relationship, though the idea of one seems very pleasant. We, also, both know what we want, and aren't willing to give up whatsoever.
I want to be more like her, because even though she was somewhat awkward, she was a very strong woman. (Yes, this means I want to be a strong woman. Haha!) She wrote a very controversial book, and she never doubted it one bit. She was very comfortable with everything she wrote. I always feel like people are critiquing my work harshly in their heads, simply hating everything about it. She knew how to stand up for herself, which I can only seem to do when I finally feel that I've taken enough.
Throughout the movie, I felt like I was looking up to her. Rather than merely being a fictional character, she became a role model, and a motivational figure for me. Watching her determination and strong-willed nature made me want to be just like her. Easily, she was my favorite character, though she was not the only lovable one. I highly recommend that you see this movie!
Song of the Week!
This song is called "Rocket Girl" by Stellar, and I really enjoyed the song and video. It took a while, but now I absolutely love it. Believe it or not, this video got banned (so I read) in South Korea because of "violent images". Well, even though it's a bit violent, I wouldn't necessarily say it's rated R quality. It's definitely a very innocent video, I think.
I know, it seems like all I post is Korean music, but that's the only thing that's ever relevant. So yeah. Don't be hatin'.
Thanks for reading! Tune in next week for another brilliant post!
First and foremost, here's my Supernatural Fanfiction, which I'm almost finished with! Chapters 1-23.
So today, I thought I'd talk about something I know EVERYONE can relate to. In our lifetime, most of us want to be loved by someone, and some people spend copious amounts of time trying to find this one person. Many people have their certain standards about their personalities or whatnot, but to lots of others, there's another aspect that they search for. That's right, they also look for how attractive (physically) they are.
The issue is: Are looks really all that important in the relationship? I mean, sure. Just because someone is smokin' hot, it doesn't mean they're going to be the most reliable and loving person on the planet. In fact, many people think it's the opposite. I'll admit, I've had my fair share of thinking someone's attractive, only to find out they're a complete douche bag, but who says that it's always supposed to be that way?
There are many sides to this argument (at least from what I hear from different people). There are people who think that being physically attracted to their partner isn't essential. They think that a relationship is based solely on what they see on the inside, and not what's on the outside.
There are people who think looks are a bonus. They'll try hard to find someone who they're physically attracted to, but they won't necessarily make it a priority. If they find someone who they connect with on an emotional level, it might be all they need, but if they aren't necessarily "pretty", whether they think they are or not, they'll still stay happy and content with them.
And of course, there are the ones who base relationships solely on how people look. If the person isn't physically attractive to them at all, they won't even consider getting to know them. These people might be considered "picky", but others might just call it high standards.
What's my side on the issue? Personally, I want to be physically attracted to my partner. I feel like I won't be able to be in a relationship unless I'm able to look at the person without having a strong urge to look away. Now I'm sure some of you could be thinking, "Damn, this guy's shallow". Almost everyone I know can vouch for the fact that I'm not the least bit shallow. I'm saying this because I know I'm not the hottest thing on the block.I just think you have to connect with your partner in more ways than just emotionally, because you're, potentially, going to be spending the rest of your life with this person.
There's the underlying "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" type of thing when it comes to this topic, of course. I'm not trying to say that certain people only pick people that are attractive, but are attractive to them. Not all of us have the same taste, so I could think someone is absolutely hunky, while you think they're junky.
Song of the week!
This is a multi-racial kpop band whom I've fallen in love with. This song has been on repeat since I've discovered it.
I'm back, readers! I have returned from the beautiful land of Yellowstone, though somewhat regretfully. The weather was absolutely amazing compared to the daily triple-digit temperatures in Phoenix. I almost didn't want to come back, but I was also ready to be home.
Before I go on, I've added some chapters to my Supernatural Fanfiction since my last post, so here you go! Chapters 1-15. I'm hoping to just have it done by the time summer is over, but...we'll see.
So anyway, Yellowstone was quite an experience. It was a beautiful city (Yes, it was that big, though I'm sure everyone already knew that...) filled with wonders I never imagined could exist. There were more trees than I could even begin to count, and there were so many thermal features (geysers/hot springs/mudpots/fumaroles). Most of them smelled terrible though, because of the sulfur. So they were pretty and interesting to look at, but you find yourself leaving only a few seconds later because of the overpowering stench. Here's one we saw!
This one was simply a hot spring, but there was so much steam from it, I just had to take a picture. It was windy that day, and the steam would soar through us, and luckily for us, it wasn't smelly steam. It felt pretty amazing, though I'm sure that water was a little too hot to actually go in. Darn.
We saw some waterfalls too while we were there, and there was one in particular that really looked amazing. In fact, I'm using it as an excuse to show off a picture that I'm very proud of. I swear, it's photography gold, and you'd swear I was majoring in photography, and not English, after seeing it.
See? Look at it! LOOK AT IT! I felt so good about this picture. Sadly, it's probably the only breathtaking picture I'll ever take with my wimpy, 12 megapixel digital camera.
The amount of bison we saw was unbelievable! They even got ridiculously close to the road, and acted like it was the most reasonable thing to do. They'd cross the street and act like we weren't even there.
This one buffalo...he didn't even care. He just walked in front of our car at his own, slow little pace, without a care in the world. He even glanced behind him at us, almost like "Yeah yeah, I see you." It was probably my favorite moment while we were there.
We saw lots of other animals, such as deer, antelope, moose, and even chipmunks! We saw bears and wolves as well, but we had to visit a bear/wolf preserve in Montana because of how rare it is to see them in the park. We got close to seeing a bear, because everyone was stopped on the side of the road, saying a bear was among the large rocks. Of course, they also said they saw it ten minutes before, and it was hiding. My thoughts: "Yes, people. This bear is DEFINITELY going to come out with all of us standing her with cameras."
I learned some things about Yellowstone while I was there. It was almost a community of its own, and you quickly become a part of it. Here's some things I found out, and some things that you can possibly take note of if you've never been there:
1. If there are cars pulled over on the side of the road, don't think "What the hell, guys! Move!" Think: "They're looking at something amazing! Let's go look at it!"
2. Wherever there was a majestic animal to see, there was a park ranger telling you to move along.
3. The foreigners can, and will take a whole five minutes to try and get a picture while you're walking along the trails, effectively wasting that much time of your day.
Oh. the foreigners. As pleasant as it was to see all these people from other countries, it was also quite amusing to see how they operate. More than half the foreign groups I saw, while taking pictures, would stand there with no emotion on their face. I would just think: "Why even take a picture if you're not going to look like you enjoyed your time there?"
After our few days at Yellowstone, we headed back to Jackson and spent our last few days there. We went Whitewater rafting, which I regret not doing when I had the chance many years ago. It was a blast! Though, we had a relatively disappointing crew. The lady that sat between my sister and I was so paranoid, I was surprised she didn't collapse from a heart attack. She claimed that she had gone on a Whitewater rafting trip before, which would make you think she wouldn't be so nervous, but she was. It bugged me beyond belief. She was quick to bark orders at us about "You better paddle hard guys, because I don't wanna fall out!", even though she refused to paddle. She wasn't the only one, though. The lady sitting beside my stepmom solemnly told her, after our guide gave us instructions on what to do if someone fell out, not to fall out. Despite all this, I had a lot of fun, and it gave us a lot to talk about after the rafting trip.
I also went horseback riding. That was so much fun! My horse was awesome, and I swear we were so identical in personality. Her name was Trojan. So yes, guys, I rode the Trojan horse.
There we are, in all of our glory. She had a strong go-with-the-flow personality, though she would try to eat when she wasn't supposed to. She only tried to eat when our wrangler had us stop, so she would eat because we weren't doing anything else anyway. I would try to stop her (because the wrangler told us to) but she would fight it. It was like she was saying: "Seriously? We're not doing anything else, jerk." She was also very excited to be back at the stables, because she would try to get ahead of the other horses. Yup, just like me.
Excuse the spanish, I just thought it fit pretty well. Anywho, I know how petty it sounds, but it's just kind of annoying. I don't want to say "Can't we find something that all of us want to do?" because I don't want to be the one who complains. It's not like they were depriving me of activities, but why do the activities need to be something I don't want to do? I don't want people to revolve around my needs, but I know they're thinking that I don't mind sitting around the hotel, or just simply taking a walk around the area, since that's just how I work. I just wonder if I'm too easygoing. I wonder if I need to roll with the punches a little less, and let people know that I'm not always okay with doing what everyone else wants to do, and I'm not always okay with sitting on the sidelines while everyone else has fun. Again, excuse me if I sound petty, but I don't know if there was any other way to get my opinion across. I'm really not all that petty....haha!
I realize this is quite a long post, but I had to make up for not being able to post last week, right?
Don't forget to vote in my poll! I know, it's a simple question, but it's just a test run to see how many people will actually do it. It's located at the top left side of my blog page!
I've been working my tail off on my Supernatural Fan-Fiction. I plowed through so many writers' blocks, I thought I was going to explode. Here's Chapters 1-12.
I have quite the random topic to talk about today, and I actually got the idea for it yesterday, as I was getting ready to run some errands with my mother yesterday. It's something all of us (at least a large portion of us) complain about, and are almost never satisfied with. That's right: our hair.
We complain about "bad hair days" and when we're actually having good hair days, all we can do is worry about whether it's going to get messed up or not. Or worse: there are winds as strong as hurricanes outside. I have noticed, though, that it's the women who complain about their hair more than men, but I do know some men who are ridiculously self-conscious about their hair. I'm one of them.
I learned that my hair is incredibly indecisive, and it almost never wants to do what I want it to do. It has its own personality, it seems. Even though I use gel to style it, and you'd think that it would actually obey me because of this, it still rebels against me. There are many things I've learned about how to manage it, too:
1. NEVER style it while it's wet. It will ALWAYS look terrible.
2. As my hair gets longer, my gel strength needs to be stronger.
3. If my hair even looks remotely presentable, I need to leave it alone, or else I'll just mess it up.
In my opinion, the way your hair looks can be an excellent indicator of many things, such as your style, hygiene, and how well you like to present yourself to people. I could have been camping for maybe a week, but if I come back, do my hair and make it look great, it would look like I kept clean throughout the whole trip. Because your hair is something that everyone can see, (unless you're wearing a hat, obviously) making it impressionable can work wonders on what people think of you.
Quick announcements: I will be in Yellowstone next Wednesday (Yay!), and I'm quite certain that I'll be busy that day, so there's a great chance that there won't be a blog post next Wednesday. I'm probably going to bring my laptop on the trip, but if we're too busy on that day, and I'm too tired, it just won't happen. Just so you know!
Also, I added a poll to my blog (it is on the top left area of my blog page), that all of you should answer!
And now it's time for the Song of the Week!
I have been on a Victorious kick lately, and this song was on the most recent episode "Locked Up" (It was a pretty entertaining episode, not gonna lie). I also bought the soundtrack. It's a guilty pleasure: Don't judge. While this isn't my favorite song on the soundtrack (that one is on my previous post), I've still found my self unable to stop listening to it.
That's all for now. Have a great Wednesday, everyone!
Added a few new chapters to my Supernatural Fanfiction, so here you go! Chapters 1-8.
Feelin' pretty awesome, guys. I've lost 15 pounds this summer!
Alright, Jeff. Get on with the topic! So I saw Friends With Benefits (the movie, duhhh) a few days ago, and that is what inspired this blog post. In case you aren't street smart, and you've never been taught what "friends with benefits" are, then maybe I should get on with teaching you this terminology.
Friends with Benefits: noun A set of friends who engage in casual, sexual acts with each other, but try to keep it from getting emotional. Strictly meant for pleasure.
If your version of "friends with benefits" is anything other than this, such as friends who share cake or toys with each other, you might want to think of a new title before people think differently. Just think of "My FWB and I are going to go share some toys today" would sound to someone who knows the correct definition for it.
Anyway, it was mentioned in the movie that you can never have a connection like that without one of the friends becoming emotionally close to the other. With all the physical affection (whether sexual or not) you share with that person, it's bound that someone is going to end up becoming fond of them in a romantic sense.
My opinion on this is that, well, I don't think a friends with benefits connection is possible. I've thought about how I would be if I had a friend like this, and I think I would end up becoming to attached to them. If they were flirting with someone, I couldn't do anything about it because we, technically, have no obligations to each other. I can't ask something of them that they aren't entitled to do in the first place. I don't necessarily think these types of friendships are wrong, but I just think there's too many complications.
So yes, I don't think it's possible to have a friends with benefits connection with someone. It's just bound to turn into an emotional mess that gets way too out of control, and someone will wind up getting hurt. Hey, if you're one of the people who's made it work, then good for you. I'm glad you've found a way.
I kind of like posting songs at the end of each post, so I think I'll continue to do so! Here's my favorite one for this week.
I finally found a full version of this song! Yes! These are my two FAVORITE characters from Victorious, and this song is so amazing. For those who watch Victorious, but haven't seen this episode, it's the one where Cat and Jade get kicked out of the karaoke joint because the girls they sang against had them kicked out (the place is owned by the brunette one's dad).
Anyway, enjoy that, and see y'all again next Wednesday!
So I added another chapter to my fanfiction. Here you go! Just change the tab thingy in the top or bottom right if you've read all the other chapters.
The questions kind of failed, so maybe I'll try that again another time. When I'm more popular...haha!
So I was watching True Life: I want to be straight, and it spurred lots of terrible emotions in me. I can't even begin to tell you how upset I was while I was watching it.
To give you some background (for those who didn't see it), it followed the stories of two individuals who wanted to be straight because of social pressures, mostly by their family. The first person introduced was a lesbian woman (Melanie) who had a mother that can't stand the fact that she's living this lifestyle. They've gotten into many altercations over her sexuality, and this caused her to try to pursue a heterosexual lifestyle. She doesn't like dating guys because she feels a better connection with girls, but the only problem she has is her mother, and she pursues a heterosexual lifestyle just so her mother will stay in her life.
The second individual was a man who was raised under a heavy Christian household (Kevin). He realized he was attracted to guys, and started pursuing that lifestyle, but his parents told him that it was wrong because of what the bible says, so he tried as hard as he could to be straight. He read the section of the bible that says how homosexuality is wrong every day, just to remind himself that he will be turned away by his family if he is to continue being gay.
The parents of each of these individuals were terribly intolerant of them, and this is especially what got to me. Melanie's mother simply didn't like that she was lesbian, and physically harmed her, just for this reason. She was willing to stop talking to her daughter just because she was interested in women, and that, to me, is just a terrible way to be.
Kevin's dad told him he was PROUD that Kevin was becoming straight. His friends supported his decision, but in my opinion, friends are supposed to support you no matter how ridiculous the decision. What angered me about that, though, is that they prayed for him, saying to "protect him from the devil". What the hell? So all of us homosexuals are infected by the devil then, huh?
My point is, how come a parent just can't accept their gay child? They're not doing anything to the parent PERSONALLY, so why is it so upsetting to them? The intolerance of the people in these poor souls' lives made me angry, because I know they aren't the only people who deal with this. I'm very lucky to have a loving and accepting family, but I just wish everyone's family was that way.
And since I feel like sharing, I will be listening to this song for forever. So I figure I can share it with my readers. It's beyond amazing, and I just can't stop listening.
I guarantee that you'll be walking around your house singing "Good bye, baby good bye~" from now on. It's just that amazing!
Feelin' pretty good right now, guys. I've lost ten pounds this summer! I'm going to work even harder because I want to lose even more before college starts again, and hopefully continue my weight loss through the next year at college!
Also, I wrote another chapter of that fan-fiction thingy. Here it is! If you need the first chapter, (or any other, for that matter), you can use the tab at the top (or bottom) right to change the chapter you are reading.
So I went to the All Star baseball game yesterday, and I'll admit, it was pretty exciting. I usually go to Diamondback games because I like the atmosphere of baseball games, but at this game, I actually found myself enjoying the sport a lot more. The players played with much more intensity, and it was just so much more captivating.
I even got that awesome All Star monkey :D I rule. For real.
One thing made me pretty angry, though. While the Symphony was performing "Oh, Canada", some guy near our section, rudely, decided to constantly holler, "Who cares!?" There are just way too many things I can say about him, and everyone like him. I'm sure most of the people around him shrugged it off, saying "Whatever", and I'm sure some people silently agreed with him, but I was offended. I'm absolutely sure that he is the reason people think Americans, as a whole, are ignorant people who don't tolerate anyone outside of their country. Our country isn't exactly perfect either, ignorant man at the game. We're in a recession, almost everyone hates the president, and we're the fattest country on the planet. You're only reinforcing to the other countries' opinions of us. I'm sure your parents raised you better than that.
I want to try something new. Because I've been running out of things to talk about, I figure the next blog post can be responses to questions! You can comment on this post with a question and I will answer it for you. (Please make sure it's appropriate. I'll be the judge of which ones I find appropriate. It can be anything, really. Preferably something I can elaborate on...haha!) Ask me anything, and I'll be sure to answer! It will be kind of like that dying website...formhop? Oh wait, formspring! Duhh. I almost forgot about it!
Hello, my lovely readers. Recently, I went to the beautiful city of San Diego, and Hollywood, to venture through Sea World and Universal Studios! It's been a long time since I've been to Sea World, and I'd never been to Universal Studios, so this was quite a trip for me!
Sea World was pretty amazing, you know, except for getting my face burned like toast on a bad morning. Luckily, we bought aloe, which I used on my face like a maniac. Anyway! We saw sea animals and whatnot. It was fun. We tried to go to the shark exhibit, but it was so dark in there, I couldn't even see the person in front of me. The power was out, unbeknown to us. The lady just, basically, sent us to our doom, without a care in the world that we would possibly be tripping over our own feet. Of course, we discovered the power was out AFTER we left the exhibit. Awesome! On the plus side, we rode two amazing rides there. One was the Shipwreck Rapids, in which we got soaked. We also rode the Journey to Atlantis, in which we still got soaked.
That ride was so fun. It made me tingle with happiness.
Day two of our trip included a day at Universal Studios. We got there at about 1:00pm, so we were pretty limited on what we could do. So limited, we ended up going on two things. We waited in line for The Mummy ride, and I was so excited to go on it, until we, I kid you not, got to the front of the line, only for the ride to be broken down. We waited in that line for a short amount of time compared to the wait time for the other rides, but it was still pretty upsetting that we didn't get to go on it. So with our disappointment, we trudged over to Jurassic Park, which was still fun, but I still wanted to go on The Mummy. After that, we went on the Universal Tour, which was pretty cool, actually. We got to see the sets they used and some of the secrets to their movie magic. So cool! I do want to go back, though, because there was a lot of things we didn't get to do there.
We also spent some time at the beach, which was very bittersweet for me. While I did enjoy all the eye candy prancing around the bay area, it was also a shot to my self esteem. While I don't necessarily want to look all chiseled and muscular, I just kind of got to thinking "You know, they're never going to talk to me because of all this extra weight". Most of them probably weren't attracted to guys anyway, but still. It just made me feel very self conscious, so I decided I need to try extra hard to lose weight. I don't know if that would even help, but I sure am going to try anyway. People have been telling me that if I'm going to lose weight, I should lose it for myself, and no one else. I am losing it for myself, but I also want to lose it because I know it looks highly disgusting to most people. I feel like if I get rid of it, more guys would actually approach me or be willing to talk to me.
Anywho, that's it for this week. No new chapters on my fanfiction yet (but here it is, just in case you missed it), and I actually GAINED a little bit of weight (Thanks to vacationing), so I don't really feel like updating on my progress.
I've achieved an amazing feat (so far) this summer! I've lost some weight! I've lost seven pounds so far, and will continue to lose this unnecessary fat. Take that, excess fat! Besides, I need to look good for my sophomore year of college. Duhh.
New York passed their Marriage Equality bill! Yay! I was so happy to hear about that, and I'm so glad that the gay community is starting to see some light in our situation. I sure hope New York is not our last victory!
I wrote the third and fourth chapter of my fan-fiction. And here they are! If you haven't read the first two, and would like to, just click the tab at the bottom (or top) right of the page, and go to the first chapter.
So I have something kind of personal to talk about today. In my experience as a gay male, I've noticed it's a bit hard. I feel like I don't get respect from other males (other than a given few), and that it'll be harder for me to find someone to date. I'm not saying I have it the hardest, and I'm not saying gays have it harder than anyone else to find a partner, I'm just stating how I feel. I just always find myself liking straight males. I feel like I can't ever just go and flirt with a guy because I'm interested in him, because I have to take the extra work to figure out if he's even gay, first.
What I'm trying to get at is, if I were born a girl instead of a gay male, would I have it easier? I could actually flirt with a guy without him saying "Ew you're gay, back off." Then again, I might have to deal with "You're ugly", but at least my life would be a bit more straightforward. I wouldn't be treated different by people of the same gender, and I wouldn't struggle (as much) with finding someone.
After thinking about it, though, I think I'm content with being a gay male. If I was born a straight girl, or a straight male for that matter, how would I act? Would I even support this much needed cause that I feel so strongly for? Would I hate the gay community? I feel better knowing that I AM one of the people I'm fighting so hard for, and I don't think I'd have it any other way.
Before you ask, no, I would not get a sex change, because I just don't like the idea of getting one. I'm fully supportive of anyone who gets them, though, because if that makes them happy, I think they should go for it. To me, it just wouldn't feel the same.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my super deep thoughts. So deep, it's mind-blowing, right? Yeah, I know.
By the way, I wanted to share this with you, because I'm probably going to be jamming to it for the next thousand months. Roly poly, roly roly poly! (There is a video for it, but it's like, twelve minutes long, and there are no subs for the speaking parts, so I figured I wouldn't bore you with that.)
Anywho, thanks for reading! Don't jam too hard to this song! I know it's impossible, though.
What's funny, is that's what I used to call one of my friends in band, because one day, while we were in Canada, she was all like, "Yeah and then we can get some stuff 'n stuff." Then we all laughed. She had also said "Tomorrow-morrow" at one point too. That was a fun trip.
Anywho, life's been pretty slow lately. I finished the second chapter of my fanfiction! If you'd like to read it, here you go! Chapters 1&2 (make sure you go to the bottom and change the "Chapter 1" tab to "chapter 2" if you've already read the first one. If not, read the first chapter first! Duh). The third chapter is in progress, so be lookin' out for it!
So I did go to a baseball game over the weekend, which was pretty cool. We went for my Aunt's birthday, and we ate at a mighty delicious Asian restaurant called Pei Wei before we headed to the game. They have this AMAZING soda machine there that let's you pick a variety of flavors for your soda. I usually get raspberry Sprite, but there are sooo many other things you can get with it.
The first time I ever saw it, my sister and I tried like, every single flavor (almost) and decided that raspberry Sprite was the best. I'm determined to try every single flavor that sounds delicious, though.
So at the game, many awesome things happened! My Aunt and I sat behind a very big-haired lady, who made us angry (for many reasons). She got up and left after the first or second inning, and we were like, "Yes! We can see!" Then she came back later, thwarting our fun with her giant hair yet again. Oh, and that wasn't the end of it. She decided to use some strange liquid on herself toward the end of the game, squirting it all over the back of her neck. Basically, it smelled like a peppermint gone bad. My Aunt and I were just about ready to hurl. I kid you not, that smell did not go away until we left the game. I'm sure she made her significant other very happy by smelling like moldy mint, wherever that man was, or if there even is one.
Also, there was this group of people another row ahead of moldy mint lady, that took pictures of themselves the whole entire game. They took pictures in about fifty different poses, self portraits (myspace pic style), photos of all three of them (also myspace style), pictures of just two of them, pictures of just themselves, and so on. They did not stop. They even made me take two of the pictures! Seriously, guys, how many interesting pictures can you take at a baseball game in which you're just sitting in your seats?
That's about all I have for now, but I just thought I'd share those interesting stories from the weekend. Oh, the people you encounter at baseball games.
Life updaaaaates! Just imagine me singing that in a very high pitched, opera voice. Anyway! I've been watching a lot more Supernatural lately, and it was MUCH harder to find full episodes online than I thought it would be. No really, I was hunting for almost half an hour. On that note...I wrote the first chapter of my Supernatural fanfic! A New Addition. Click it and read if you'd like!
Also, I learned how to make my favoritest (I realize that's not a word, but this is just very deserving of a made up word) cake in the whole wide world. Oh dang, right when you take a bite of this delicious cake, you just can't help but get another slice. I forgot to take a picture of it, however, but next time I make it, I will. Here is, essentially, what it looked like.
Delicious, right? I know. My stepmom, my sister, and I did a pretty good job.
So one morning, we were on our way to my little brother's game at 8:30am (note, I'm not even up at this time on a daily basis), and we see a man standing on the side of the road. You don't usually see any homeless people or beggars on this street, but here this man was, just standing there. He was very frail, and he looked like he could just fall over at any minute. He was holding a sign that said "Will work for food", which tugged on all of our heartstrings (stepmom, sis, and I). You usually see people asking for money, or trying to guilt you into giving them money by bringing their starving dog, or saying that they're ex-military. However, this man was willing to give his time and effort just for some food, despite how frail he was. My stepmom knew she couldn't just see that and not do anything about it, especially since we would be stuffing our faces that evening because of my aunt and stepgrandma's birthday, so she stopped at a nearby Burger King and got him some food. When my sister and I went to go hand it to him, the poor guy was shaking so hard, I thought he was going to drop the bag. That's when he revealed that he hadn't eaten in two weeks, and has been unemployed for a year. He said "God bless you" to us, and enjoyed his meal.
After seeing this, I realized that it really isn't that hard to touch someone's heart. We act like these deeds are so much strenuous and tedious than they actually are, but it was just as simple as providing him some food. It also showed me that there are more honest people out there than we think. It really touched me, seeing that he'd be willing to give something in return for the food he'd be receiving. It was just a touching experience for the weekend.
I know that there's plenty of people who feel the same way I do about this, but I felt like I needed my own say in this. When someone hears the word "gay" in reference to a person, a plethora of things come to their mind. "He/She probably dresses like a man/woman." "Show tunes are their thing!" "OMIGOSH YOU SHOULD BE MY GAY BOYFRIEND." Oh, and my personal favorite. "I'm cool with them, as long as they don't hit on me." When I hear all of this, I personally feel degraded.
The gay community has been striving to gain equal rights for many years, and it hasn't been an easy journey. We, technically, are considered minorities, seeing as we won't be allowed the same rights as anyone else. And no, I'm not saying gays have it the hardest, but I AM saying that we don't have it easy. We can't show affection for our partner in public without feeling as if some form of discrimination is upon us. I'm sure I speak for the whole community when I say that we want to just be able to openly show that we love someone of the same gender, just as heterosexual couples show that they love their partners without being judged.
Not only that, but we're discriminated against when it comes to getting a job. If the boss doesn't approve of someone being gay, he'll surely just fire them, or not hire them if he finds out when they apply. What difference does it make? How on earth would that affect job performance? Oh yeah, that's right. People believe stereotypes.
First off, just because I tell you I'm gay, and you HAPPEN to be the same gender as I, it doesn't mean I'm attracted to you. I don't want to get with every man I see, just as you don't want to get with every woman you see. I've had a friend ask me, every time I looked at a guy, "Would you do him?" No, I wouldn't, because I'm not a slut.
Not every gay male is feminine. I know and have seen plenty of jock-type gay guys. We don't all want to be women.
Ladies, as flattered as we are by you loving us because we're attracted to guys, stop. We have more than one dimension, and we won't be your "gay boyfriend". That doesn't even make sense. I've had a personal experience with this one. I had a friend who would constantly talk about how I'm gay. She would always bring it up in conversations, almost as if she was reminding me. One day, while we were eating lunch, I said something that was funny (I think...) and her response was "Oh Jeff, I don't think I would love you if you weren't gay." Well, yeah, I'm sure you would, because I would probably be the same person, just attracted to girls. Being gay is not the only thing I want to be thought of, and I'm sure I'm also not alone on that one. Anyway...more stereotypes...
Oh, here's one. And yes, I have been asked this before. "Do you get turned on when you look at your own penis?" I won't even go on about how stupid I feel that question is.
There are many other stereotypes out there, these are the ones that just irk me the most. I will say that, yes, there are many people that fit these negative stereotypes (well, most of them), but it has nothing to do with the fact that they're gay. If some guy is hitting on a straight guy, knowing that he is flirting with a straight guy, this has NOTHING to do with the fact that he's gay, it has to do with the fact that he doesn't know his boundaries.
I just feel like the gay community is never going to be taken seriously because of how we are viewed by society. We're seen as girly, horny rainbow-crazed freaks who run around having sex with other men and dressing in women's clothing (a dramatization, of course). I don't think that this means these people need to change the way they portray themselves, but rather how people judge them. There are always gonna be the few who act exactly the way society views them, but that doesn't mean gays, as a whole, are stereotypical. We're never going to be treated the same at that rate, which would mean that, like we all are taught, our opposers need to see beyond the stereotype, and not let that cloud their vision of the people we truly are inside. I certainly don't want to live in a world where I'm prohibited from marrying the man I love, and I most DEFINITELY don't want to live in this world knowing that I'm judged because of the one thing people see me as. Gay.
To end this entry, I'll share a picture I feel is very accurate.
Life hasn't changed much since I posted last. Haven't cooked any more delicious food, and I haven't started my fan-fiction yet...but all in good time, will this happen!
I found the most ADORABLE picture of my current obsession. Well, the characters of the show "Supernatural"...but come on. We all know I'm posting it because I find them highly attractive.
Oh...yes. Highly attractive. I've been watching this show religiously (kind of) since the beginning of summer. I will do my best to finish EVERY EPISODE by the time summer ends. I'm hoping to do that much sooner, but, well, you never know. It's contributing to my fan-fiction research...because...this will be what my first one is about! Supernatural, baby. If you're interested in reading it, hit me up, and I'll make sure you will be able to read it!
So today, I was just eating pizza with mi familia at this Mom and Pop pizza restaurant about fifteen minutes away from our house (It's called Rochelli's Pizza House, and if you live in the Phoenix, Arizona area of the world, you should try it out, because it's the only thin crust pizza in the world I can say that I absolutely adore). We're somewhat connected to the owners because my aunt knows them, and my family hangs out there a lot now. I knew I would eventually be meeting this owner, Mark Smith, and talking to him about the usual things like where I go to school, summer plans, major, and all that mumbo jumbo. Though, as if the heavens above were sending me a message, I never expected him to come out and say, (after I explained to him that I wanted to be a writer) "Oh! I've written a sitcom! You should read it. Here ya go!" This motivated me. Like, a lot. I don't know what it was, but hearing about all the work he had put into it, and all the times he's tried to get it produced, it just made me want to be a successful writer even more.
This also taught me a very valuable, and exceptionally different lesson of "never judge a book by its cover". Never in my life would I have walked into a pizza restaurant, talked to the owner, and thought "Oh, he's probably done some really cool things in his life, like written a sitcom!" It's things like these that make me realize that people have their own stories, and they've done a lot more than what I see on the surface. I better get to writing, because, you know, I want to be able to slip "Oh hey! You should read one of my works" into a conversation at an appropriate time. I'd feel pretty awesome.
I'm finally on my summer break! Thank the heavens above! I can finally just go through a whole day without thinking about academics or what's due the next day. Might I add, I had all A's and B's my first year in college. Do I rock, or what?
Now that summer's beginning, I've been trying to find things to do in order to keep me from dying a terrible death...of being murdered by boredom. Other than the large amounts of video games I will be playing, and the shows I need to catch up on, I'll actually be doing something productive,or at least I will be trying!
I've decided I want to learn to cook. I have been motivating myself by watching endless hours of Food Network. I want to be able to make delicious things, and hopefully be skilled enough to renovate dishes that I know and make them better. I feel like I've taken on quite the task...but I'm gonna do it! In fact, here's the first thing I cooked! (Thanks for helping, mom!)
So this marvelous dish is called Sopita. My mom has made it ever since I was old enough to remember, and I love it each and every time I eat it. When I try to explain it to my friends, I usually just say, "It's like Mexican macaroni and cheese". It contains macaroni noodles, tomato sauce, and colby jack cheese. For flavor, we add garlic salt, pepper, and some crushed red peppers for spice. I'm pretty sure I can make this on my own now, so I definitely know I'm making progress!
Well, back to more exciting stuff! (Can't end this entry on a sad note.) I'm also thinking of ways to improve my writing. Blogging is one of them, which I will be trying to do more often, but I need more. I crave more. So...I might do something I wanted to stay away from. I might...write fan-fiction. Oh Lord, you have no idea how hard that was to say. Anywho, if you aren't familiar with the world of fan-fiction, it's basically taking books/movies/video games that already exist, and creating a story using it. (I'm trying my best to explain this...so bear with me!) Basically, you're just using that material as a premise, while creating your own story within it, using the characters from it and/or adding your own characters. I'm only so against it because I had a certain friend who would act like it was the actual story, and thus, I thought I would turn into a noob as well. (Noob: n. A person who fails.)
Hopefully, after this summer, I'll feel a bit better about myself and be somewhat productive. Here I come, summer! And on that note, I'll make sure to think of wittier comments this summer...
Disclaimer: This post is brought to you by Jeff on Three Hours of Sleep inc.
So I just recently played one of the most horrific games (well, the series is horrific) in my lifetime. Silent Hill: Homecoming is the name of this beauty, and I thoroughly enjoyed each and every moment of it (when I wasn't peeing my pants). It was quite an amazing story line, and I probably could have gone through the whole game without stopping. However, being tired forced me to stop at about 3:30am when I had started around 8:30pm with my highly interesting friends, minus the one who worked himself up so much, he fell asleep (you know who you are, mis amores!) Fatigue...how dare you!
Well anyway, this game gave me three hours of sleep that night. Only three hours for fudge's sake. I woke up at about 6:45am, and images of the game clouded my mind. I desperately tried to close my eyes and fall back into dreamland, but failed. It was a surprise to me that I even fell asleep. It was almost a struggle to figure out what to do with all this time on a Sunday morning. However, I did make it through just about half that beautifully haunting game, so I joined up with my brave friend to conquer my first true horror game (after consuming my body weight in caffeine, of course). I must be a masochist. I mean, yeah, I played Resident Evil games, but this was way different. Dead bodies don't fall from the ceiling in Resident Evil games, and creepy dolls don't soak up blood and become twice your size in order to kill you.
In this sense, I feel like I'm such a contradiction. Horror games are so excited for me to play, but I can't help but be scared shortly after I play them. I learned in Psychology that horror is supposed to be a certain arousal we have as human beings to create a sense of enjoyment, but why on earth would I still subject myself to this nonsense? Oh, right. It's fun.
Either the game was gradually losing its sense of horror, or I was being desensitized, because toward the end, I became less afraid of the game. This is actually my goal, to be honest. I hate that I become disturbed from horror games after playing them, but the plots are always so good, that I feel like I need to toughen up and play these games for real. As a writer, I feel like I'm also expanding my horizons by playing these games, and subjecting myself to the mental torment. In the end, I know it will be worth it!
Now, I have some advice. If you're like me, and you're a big wimp when it comes to horror, there are some things that I noticed I do to keep me from going insane.
1. If you don't care for the theatrical effect of the room (playing in the dark) you're participating in horror (games, movies, etc.), watch/play these games/movies earlier in the day. Make sure to stop at a time in which you can busy yourself with other things before you go to bed (especially if that's what bothers you).
2. Always remind yourself that the horror in the media (depending on what you're playing/watching) isn't real. Trust me. After Silent Hill, I had to convince myself that nurses with heads wrapped in bandages who attempt to slice your throat out...do not exist.
3. Have friends/family in the room with you. I always enjoy when my friends make commentary during gameplay to keep me from being too nervous to go on. However, I make sure that they stay quiet during cutscenes in games. (For horror movies, having someone with you can still prove useful, but only for moral support, and possibly not commentary, especially if you can't stand people talking during a movie. Just make sure they shut up when there's dialogue again!)
4. Just have at it! If you don't subject yourself to horror, you'll never get used to it, and you will always be cowering in fear.
Music is one of things that EVERYBODY in this world loves, I'm sure. Certain types make us happier than others, and others are more pleasurable to hear, but our reasons for liking songs are much different. People enjoy beats, the lyrics, the way the person's voice sounds, and many other aspects of certain songs.
I happen to be a very avid Korean pop fan (I listen to rock/alternative. and some american pop as well, but Korean pop is one of my favorites, along with rock/alternative/indie). I enjoy it so much, that I probably listen to it for at least an hour every day. When I mention to anyone that I am a fan, a very common response is, "How can you like it if you can't even understand it?" Well, that's a great question. I enjoy music based on how everything fits together. If the words, instrumentation, and the person's voice all sound good to me, I'll enjoy the song. Very seldom do I find a song where the lyrics are just so terrible that I can't even handle it. If I really get curious about my koreans' lyrics, I just look them up. It's really not that hard.
This just really bugs me because it's like, why do I have to understand the lyrics just to like the song? I'll admit, I thoroughly enjoy songs with deep, lyrical meanings (Say Anything, one of my favorite bands, has lots of those), but I also enjoy songs in which the lyrics aren't all that great (depending on my circumstances). Like, my koreans. They sing about love and falling in it and all that good stuff. The lyrics can be pretty childish, and it doesn't take a whole lot of brain power to understand what their point is, but I enjoy the songs anyway. You have to be talking about some pretty terrible stuff for me to actually dislike a song for the lyrics.
Like everything else in life, we should like music for our own reasons, and not because of what anyone else says. I know, for sure, that I'm getting sick of people asking me about why I like Korean pop, even though I don't understand it. I choose not to follow the norm. I like it for my reasons, and not yours.
You would expect, and hope, that your friends would be your main source of support for you and your choices (other than family, of course). What happens when you have those certain friends that just seem to leave you in the dust when it comes to being supported? How do you handle hearing that something about you is just something they don’t support?
Sorry, but I like to use these examples of my homosexuality, because they seem so relevant at times. I have had/still have friends that were completely against gay marriage. Obviously, I’m completely for it. It’s hard hearing that someone I admire and support in every way feels like I shouldn’t be happy in the future. I almost feel furious at them, so badly wanting to just give them every breath of spiteful words that I ever could, but I know that it just wouldn’t be worth it. What could I possibly say?
That’s where the dilemma kicks in. It’s not like you can force them to support something that they don’t stand for, but how do you handle it when it happens? The best I’ve been able to do is try and avoid the subject at all costs, but when these friends (because they don’t ALWAYS keep their harsh opinions to themselves) say something offensive about it, I feel as if I have to retaliate, no matter how much I care about them. I don’t make fun of what they stand for, so I don’t expect them to do the same.
This support doesn’t even have to be drastic. It can even be smaller things. Just little reminders that say that they’re your friend, and they have your back no matter what. Acting a certain way about someone’s beliefs or what they stand for can leave them feeling abandoned. It could make them feel as if they’re the only one standing up against the forces of their opposition. Even if you don’t agree with some belief they just keep ranting on about, just say that it’s at LEAST interesting (because that’s a very neutral answer, according to my Humanities teacher), or praise them for how passionate they are about it, because aspects like that make us human. Friends need to be supportive, because no one deserves to feel alone.
So you’re walking to class/work/to the store/your dog/your cat, and you come across someone whom you normally see somewhere that isn’t where you’re currently standing, whether it be at school, at work, or any other place you met them. Suddenly, you feel awkward. Has this happened to you? I know it happens to me.
I find it strange that we are weird about meeting people socially that we normally know through somewhere business related. In other words, seeing someone you know NOT in the place you normally hang with them, it feels awkward to talk to them. For example: I met someone recently who I only know around my dorm area, and they looked directly at me at least three or four times, and didn’t say a word. Sure, I could have waved, or just shouted, “HEY!”, seeing as I was about twenty-five feet away from him.
Is it just impossible to acknowledge that these people you know CAN and WILL appear in your life, and that it’s perfectly okay to talk to them outside your natural comfort zone with them? This could apply to anything! When you have a person you talk to a lot in one of your classes, you feel pretty comfortable around them. Once you see them anywhere else, such as the grocery store, or a pet store, you become uncomfortable with that person. Can this really affect how we act around this person? And how is it that we just seem to forget who they are when we aren’t seeing them in places we normally see them? This bothers me. It really grinds my gears. How can you just act as if you’ve never seen them when you have absolutely awesome conversations with them in your common meeting area? I wish I could figure this out, but human motives aren’t always so clear. Could it be because they’re used to seeing you in a certain place, and when you see them elsewhere, it throws you off guard? In my opinion, that shouldn’t affect much, but what can you do?
Kind of a sporadic topic, but hey, that’s what I do. I comment on those random happenings in life that keep you pondering.
